.-"-. ......................................____....__
  /_  _ \ FOR THE WORLD WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP: / __ \/\ \ \
 |(_\/_)|                                    / _\  /  \/ /
 (_ /\ _)        Bliss[c] versus Tigress    / /   / /\  /
  |v==v|                                    \/    \_\ \/
  '-..-' ...................................Writer: MB&EB

DH: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the Women's World Championship! [POP!] Introducing first...

["Last Resort" by Papa Roach unexpectedly BLASTS over the loudspeakers. This is obviously NOT Tigress.]

DR: Oh, PLEASE don't tell me.

SS: Don't tell Amy. You know she thinks those two are hot.

AM: WHAT! I never said hot! Good looking yes in a rebel sort of way but never hot.

SS: SURRREEEE.

[The Suicide Blondes, Adam and Jeff Grayson enter to a chorus of boos. The duo spits water into the air and pose on top of the ramp. Adam Grayson is dressed in a pair of black leather pants and a black muscle tank with a silver barbed wire design on the chest. His long blonde hair is pulled back into a ponytail and there's a pair of silver sunglasses on top of his head. Jeff Grayson is dressed in a pair of cargo khaki pants with a silver wallet chain and a blue and black lycra button down shirt with the top button undone. He also has a silver surfer choker around his neck. His long blonde hair is down with streaks of blue and black. The two pose some more before making their way down to the ring and to the commentator's table.]

JG: Jeez, it's kind of crowded down here huh?

AG: Yeah Mr. Rogers, make some room for the stars here.

DR: I'll be sure to do that. Why are you two out here anyway? This is a women's match.

JG: Erin sent us in her place. Besides, we have some time to kill after attacking Team Canada as harshly as we did.

AG: That so ruled Jeff.

DR: I feel like I'm in the movie Clueless.

JG: That's when Alicia Silverstone was hot. Now she looks like a heifer.

SS: See, I thought it was only me who noticed that.

[The opening drum beat that announces Tigress' arrival is immediately met by boos from the crowd and thousands of seizure-inducing black/white strobe lights. Tigress walks out, unaccompanied.]

DH: From Durham, North Carolina, weighing in at one hundred and forty pounds... TIGRESS!

[She looks towards the ring with a crooked, half-cocky smirk and conspicuously keeps a hand on the hilt of the katana strapped to her side. Though she is walking at a moderate pace, she looks like she is moving slowly due to the strobe lights.

With no warning at all, Bliss comes roaring out from the back and slams into Tigress with a running lariat. HUGE POP!]

DR: The match isn't underway and already we have a fight going down!

AM: Bliss and Tigress despise one another, I can't say I'm surprised.

AG: Women's match, that means they are going to start ripping their clothes off each other soon right?

DR: That's only in Erin's matches.

SS: And that's one of the reasons why I love your manager so much.

[Bliss hurls Tigress to the dasher boards along the aisleway, and then catches her with a kneelift. Tigress groans and drops the belt with her scabbard attached, before being whipped to the side of the ring. She slams into it and drops hard to her knees, but as Bliss attempts to throw her into the ring Tigress redirects her headfirst into the ringsteps.

_CLANG!_

Dazed, the women's champion tries to return to her feet and takes a knee square to the middle of her back. Tigress pulls her up and delivers a swinging uppercut, forcing Bliss to lie back across the steps. An elbow is measured before being rammed into Bliss's face, and as Tigress tries to hook her for a suplex Bliss counters.]

DR: The champion blocks the suplex, swinging neckbreaker on the floor! Wow, they're really ripping into one another.

RO: Ah, the sweet sight of whipping an opponent with a leather and gold belt.

JG: So... Where's the mud pitt?

DR: There isn't any. They are WRESTLING.

JG: Whipped cream? Marshmallow fluff? HOT FUDGE AT LEAST??!

SS: Sigh, a man after my soul.

DR: I'm afraid not.

AG: THEN WHY THE HELL ARE WE OUT HERE??!

[Bliss whips Tigress with the title a few more times before rolling her into the ring, and keeps a hold of her leg outside the ring. She slams the knee into the edge of the canvas, causing Tigress to roll in pain and curl up on the mat. Bliss climbs through the ropes as the bell finally sounds, and Referee Dale Simpson calls for the bell finally. Bliss stalks Tigress and grabs her by the leg, immediately going to work on it with a grapevine to the knee.]

SS: Much like foreplay with Red here, this could end soon.

AM: And much like Sam here, the big finale could only take a couple of seconds, if it happens at all.

RO: Ooh, now it's getting interesting.

JG: Amy, I LOVE it when you talk dirty.

SS: Careful, Amy will get a bigger head than she already has.

[SLAP! Bliss goes to the outside ring apron as Tigress begins to sit up, and the champion hits a springboard into a splash right on top. Violently she smashes the back of Tigress's head into the mat as she keeps her weight on top, and then hooks a leg. 1 -- 2 -- Tigress kicks out, dazed as she is. Bliss rolls to a sitting position, and pulls Tigress up. A kick to the knee chops her right back down, and now the 5'2 North Carolinian crawls to the ropes to attempt to get up. Bliss pulls her to a standing position and whips her into the ropes, but as she tries to chop-block Tigger back to the canvas Tigress hits a leapfrog instead, but with a twist.]

DR: Oh my, Tigress grazed Bliss in the head with that leapfrog, and it seems to have injured the champion.

SS: That was no accident. My little kittie cat did that on purpose. She's so lethal, it turns me on.

AM: Oh gimme a break, wet cement turns you on.

JG: This is a wet cement match? Now that's just naughty.

AG: That Beeby is a genius.

JG: Yes, kudos to Beeby.

DR: NO WET CEMENT! IT IS A WRESTLING MATCH! WRESTLING!!

JG: Is it just me or does Rogers need to get some?

[Bliss, holding her head as she rises, takes a kick to the stomach before Tigress grabs her and executes a lightning quick head and arm suplex. Again Bliss lands on her head, and now lies on the mat in pain. Tigress hooks a leg... 1 -- Bliss kicks out, and Tigress grabs her by the head and puts on a headscissors submission hold. The champion fights it and gets to the ropes, and Simpson calls for the break. Tigress releases but then wrenches Bliss off the ropes with an Irish whip, and on the rebound uses a jumping axe kick to the collar bone! Bliss crumples.]

RO: I'm no expert, but I'd say Tigress is focusing all of her energy on the neck of her opponent.

AM: Oz, you're a wrestler. Doesn't that make you an expert?

RO: Well, I suppose maybe it does. Fine, as an expert I say Tigress is looking to snap Bliss's neck like a tiny twig.

AG: Hey, we are wrestlers to. Why don't you ask us some strategy questions?

JG: You know, if I was Tigress, I would just put Bliss through a bunch of tables and stuff.

AG: That's your answer for everything.

JG: If it ain't broke....

[Tigress brushes herself off and stands up, then grabs Bliss by the hair. The blonde mane of the champion is used to whip her around and then off her feet, as Tigress suddenly launches herself at Bliss with a dropkick to the top of the head. The two women slowly get up, Bliss more slowly than Tigress and a lockup commences. Tigress controls things and whips her opponent to the ropes again, but as she attempts to nail another axe kick Bliss catches her and spirals to the mat in a dragon screw legwhip that causes the crowd to gasp at the sheer viciousness of it. Tigress screams in pain and clutches at her leg, as Bliss keeps a grapevine clamped onto it. The referee asks Tigress if she feels like giving up, and has to jump back as the woman known as Kitty Gunn takes a swipe at him.]

DR: Now it's Bliss's turn to work over a body part, she's really attacking the knee of Tigress. Kneedrop right to the thigh, and the challenger is in a world of hurt here.

RO: Again, as a specialist this is clearly a case of trying to snap a weakened body part.

JG: I think you need to cut all this specialist crap. Me and my brother are tag team specialists. We are EXTREME specialists, ask us questions!

DR: When we need info on the proper way to hit someone with a chair, we'll come get you.

AG: That's all we ask.

[Bliss stands up and grabs Tigress by the leg, executing a standing leglock. Tigress arches her back and drags her body over to the ropes to get the hold broken, and as Bliss releases she backs up. Attempting a dropkick to the knee, Tigress dodges and Bliss gets tangled up in the ropes. The challenger immediately drops with all her weight into Bliss's back, choking her with the bottom ring rope. Bliss coughs and chokes as Tigress slowly rolls out to the floor, and nails her in the face with a right hand. The champion rolls away from the ropes as Tigress pulls up the ring apron and searches underneath it.]

DR: This is not a hard-core match, what on earth is she doing?

AM: She's obviously looking for something, but what I don't know.

SS: Come on, baby oil!

RO: Baby oil. Survey says?!?

[_BUZZ_. At least figuratively. Tigress pulls a leather strap out from under the ring to boos from the crowd, but as she gets to her feet Bliss meets her with a baseball slide dropkick to the head! Tigress hits the cement hard as Bliss lands on her feet, and then tosses the strap over the ropes.]

JG: Alright! Now it's getting interesting!

AG: TIGRESS!! GET THE TABLE!!!

[Tigress is rolled back into the ring and Bliss follows quickly, hooking the leg for a cover. 1 -- Tigress gets a shoulder up, and Bliss yanks her back to her feet. As the blonde goes for a German suplex, Tigress counters and ducks down forward, rolling through into a cradle. 1 -- 2 -- Bliss escapes by continuing the roll right into a Half Boston!]

AM: She's trapped!

RO: Lean back on that leg and hear the ligaments tear. It's like music to my ears, you know.

SS: I'm not surprised.

JG: You are a sick, sick man. You should really try some Stone Temple Pilots or The Doors. The music is much better and it won't make people look at you like a big freak anymore.

AG: Well not as MUCH of a big freak at least.

RO: Kiddies, when I want your opinions, I will give it to you.

[Bliss releases the hold, and leaps into the air a second later to come crashing down with a leg across the knee joint. Tigress groans in pain as Bliss gets up, and grabs the strap off the mat. She loops the strap around Tigger's leg before hitting a hamstring pull, and the bloodcurdling scream from Tigress echoes through the arena. Bliss rolls to her knees, and tries to cover again. 1 -- 2 -- 3! NO! Tigress gets a shoulder up at the last second and Bliss slaps the mat in frustration.]

DR: Wow, I thought that match was over for sure. Tigress has a fierce will and determination though, as does the champion.

JG: Someone bring that tiger out here. You gotta love wild animals at wrestling shows. Bears, Tigers, it's all good.

AG: We need to start bringing an animal to the ring. A zebra or a bunny rabbit or something.

JG: That would SO kick ass.

DR: A BUNNY RABBIT?

[Bliss returns to her feet and tries to place Tigress in a Boston crab, but Tigress manages to counter and avoid it. As she drags herself to the corner Bliss grabs the strap again, but a kick to the sternum knocks Bliss back and she drops the strap as Tigress launches at her with a lariat. Bliss goes down, and immediately Tigger pounces with hard punches to the side of the head before biting down on Bliss's neck!]

SS: Good God, she's a vampire!

RO: Call Erin McCoys!

AM: Tigress is resorting to biting in the match, that's how much she and Bliss hate one another.

JG: I'm not against biting.

DR: Side headlock now being applied, Tigress is making sure to keep her opponent on the mat. Cradle, one! Two! Kickout!

[Her opponent dazed and on the canvas, Tigress gets to her feet and tries to walk off the severe limp she's got in her left leg. Supporting herself with the ropes she grinds her boot into Bliss's throat, trying to cut off the flow of air. Coughing and sputtering, Bliss shoves her opponent's foot off and rolls to her stomach, only to have a knee come down straight into the middle of her back. A modified camel clutch softens her up further until Tigress pulls her back to a standing position and scoops her up into position for a powerslam. Very suddenly she corkscrews Bliss into the mat with a neckbreaker variation, causing great pain to the women's champion.]

DR: The cover! One! Two! No- Bliss escapes! Incredible!

RO: You want to see incredible? Give Scud twenty dollars and take him to a strip club.

SS: Sounds like fun, I've never seen a dancer bitchslap someone in the middle of their routine.

AM: Not firsthand, anyways.

JG: I've seen it happen to Rogers. It wasn't pretty.

AG: Yeah, the only man in American who can't even get laid by a stripper. That's pretty pathetic.

DR: Let's focus on the match here.

[Tigress reaches down and picks up the leather strap, then wraps it around Bliss's throat and tightens. After choking her for a few more seconds she pulls the champion off her feet with a hangman's neckbreaker, aided by the leather. The crowd boos Tigress mercilessly.]

DR: Stop it, you're going to kill her!

SS: That's the whole point, Dave.

JG: I say go for the kill. It will pop a huge rating.

AG: Death = Ratings. There's no two ways about it.

[Bliss struggles and manages to return to her feet, but Tigress slams her down hard with another head and arm suplex. She rolls over for the cover... 1 -- 2 -- Kickout! Bliss picks an arm up and shows that she still has fight left, as Tigress grabs her by the hair and the leather strap again. This time a mandible claw is turned into a monkeyflip, before the challenger hurls the champion over the top rope, hanging her with the foreign object to the disgust of the crowd. BOO!]

AM: Oh come on! Enough is enough, Tigress...

AG: ILL! Drewl is coming out of her mouth!

JG: There goes her t-shirt sales.

AG: Erin doesn't drewl, when is she getting this title back?

DR: The same time she actually starts wrestling.

[Bliss hangs by the strap over the rope, and appears to be turning blue. Suddenly she manages to grip the edge of the ring and steadies herself, then snaps Tigress off with a hotshot! Returning to the ring the champion grabs Tigress by the leg again and leaps into the air, coming down in a sitting position on top of the joint. Another submission hold, this time a kneelock, is applied as Tigress begins to fade away from the pain.]

AM: This has been some match up!

RO: As a specialist, I must say I'm a little impressed. Just a little though.

DR: Bliss just pulling back on the knee. She lets go of the hold and re-applys it with more pressure.

JG: This sucks! Why did Erin make us come out here?

AG: Right on. No, one's clothes have been torn off, no pudding, no cute little Halloween costumes, and no red lights! What the hell is this?!?

DR: Well obviously you are getting the women's division mixed up with a PORNO.

JG: Hey, don't diss the porn industry. They are the hardest working people in the business.

[Bliss drags Tigress over to the ropes by the leg. She places her ankle on the bottom rope. Bliss climbs the ropes and comes CRASHING down on the knee of Tigress! Tigress screams out in pain as Bliss repeats the action! Bliss slides herself out of the ring and CRACKS the knee of Tigress down on the edge of the apron! ]

DR: These two ladies are going for blood, there's no two ways about it.

JG: Blood? Where? Where?!?

AG: WE WANT BLOOD! WE WANT BLOOD!

DR: There isn't any!

JG: Oh chill out David. This is a good match, we'll admit that. You know what would make it better though? If they were wrestling in an apartment or something.

AG: YEAH! Like, Tigress borrows Bliss's jeans without permission and Bliss is all like, "BITCH! GIMME MY JEANS BACK!" And they start rolling around on the floor. That would be tiiight.

AM: I think you two just made Sam pass out.

SS: I'm just busy writing a memo to Beeby about that being the next PPV's rematch.

[Bliss drags Tigress to her feet by her hair. CRACKING irish whip to the corner! Tigress's knee goes out from underneath her and she's slumped over in the corner with her arms hanging over the ropes, holding her up. Bliss sees her chances and starts running towards Tigress... BEAUTIFUL HANDSPRING ELBOW!]

JG: HEY! ERIN DOES THAT!

RO: One of the few moves Erin actually performs.

[Bliss starts a martial arts attack on Tigress now. She nails her in the corner with several judo chops followed up by a roundhouse kick. Tigress is just absorbing these stiff stiff shots! Bliss grabs her by the hair... MODIFIED BULLDOG! Bliss sees her chance and begins climbing the ropes as the crowd goes wild!]

DR: This could be it!

AM: Bliss is way up there!

[FROG SPLASH~! NOOOO! TIGRESS GETS HER KNEES UP! Tigress reaches into her tights and pulls out some sort of powder! Tigress pushes the ref into the ropes and while his back is turned, throws the powder into Bliss's eyes! SWINGING NECKBREAKER!]

RO: She's well prepared, gotta give her that.

DR: She's well prepared to cheat!

JG: Now that was kind of extreme.

AG: Sort of.

JG: Quasi extreme.

AG: Just one calorie.

JG: Not extreme enough.

[Tigress begins working over the neck of Bliss with a modified camel's clutch. Tigress is yanking back on the neck as the ref is right there to check and see if the champ wants to give up.]

DR: Tigress seems blood. I can't see this match lasting much longer with the high impact and pace these two women have come up with.

JG: Erin had plenty of matches like this when she was champion.

DR: Uh huh.

SS: She always looked cute.

AM: That counts for something.

[Tigress drops the hold and picks up Bliss... SHE'S GOING FOR THE POACHER'S WOE! BLISS COUNTERS! BLISS COUNTERS! She's going for a dragon sleeper! She's got it locked in!]

DR: BLISS HAS IT LOCKED IN! TIGRESS IS GOING OUT!

[Tigress fights it and counters the move again with the Tiger Trap! Bliss is fighting! She's fighting for all she's worth!]

DR: This young woman won't give up! Tigress has it locked in and Bliss won't give up!

AM: She wants to keep her title!

JG: Those who give up and run away, live to fight another day. This girl is stupid. She's gonna get seriously hurt.

DR: That's what athletes do!

AG: Save it for a Gatorade commercial.

[Bliss is going out but still refuses to give up! The ref is right on her and Tigress is screaming for her to tap out. Bliss is refusing to and slowly but surely... passes out! The ref takes one look at her and calls the match!]

DR: Is it over?!? I think the referee stopped the contest!

[Tigress refuses to let go of the submission hold as the bell rings, and only after the referee physically pulls her off does she back away. As she's handed the belt, Debs makes it official as only she can.]

DH: The winner of the match, as a result of the referee stopping the match, AND NNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWW WOMEN'S CHAMPION... TIGRESS!

AM: Tigress has the belt, but you have to hand it to Bliss in this one. She really gave it her all, and only in unconsciousness did she finally succumb.